Don't Try to Be Perfect: Just Get Better!

What is your ultimate goal? If you had unlimited resources, time, and self-control, where would your self-improvement efforts take you?

If you said perfection, then you have big trouble. The jury is in on that one. Being a perfectionist is not a great thing to be. In fact, there's a boatload its it's really, REALLY, not a great thing to be at all.

But, let's face it, when you're working on self-improvement, you want to get something just right. You want to hit and maintain a certain weight, you want to stick to your healthy eating plan, you never want to say a cuss word again.

All extremely laudable goals. All, of course, virtually unachievable. It's because of the nature of perfection. Perfection means that *nothing is wrong* But that means everything has to be right. In our hurly-burly world, where chaos and confusion runs rampant, how likely is that?

If you said, "Never gonna happen," you're right.

So, what to do?

Try thinking about self-improvement as continuous improvement that gets closer to perfection, but never achieves it. There will always be opportunities to improve yourself. Instead of dreading that possibility, welcome it. Embrace it.

After all, what life be like without challenges?

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Wellness in My Home Town!

A quick word on a new development here in Guelph. I am part of the Guelph Wellness Initiative. It's a wonderful initiative and I'm happy to play a small role. On a related matter, Oh Well is a new blog by award-winning Guelph Mercury reporter Joanne Shuttleworth on her efforts to improve wellness. Please visit her blog. I have put a link to it on my side-bar.

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When I'm Working, I'm Working, When I'm Not I'm Not: How to Avoid Constant Work in the Information Age

It's amazing isn't it? We can now stay in touch with work wherever we are. We have cell phones and, at a modest price for most, email can be accessed almost anywhere.

I love new technology and I've been taking "advantage." Or, should I say advantage has been taken of me?

It was kind of cool the first (and perhaps twentieth?) time that I received a work email standing by a road miles away from my desk. But, here's the thing: It wears thin rather quickly. I value my time away from work and I began to see my work-free time disappear. I was no longer 'in the moment.' I wasn't paying full attention to what my wife or child was saying or doing. My attention was divided and, as a result, I was robbing myself of fully experiencing and enjoying my time off. My solution was a simple one and it is one that I've also applied to my work life with good results.

I don't check email all the time.

It's as simple to say as it is hard to do. I now shut off email on evenings, weekends and family holidays. I feel remarkably free. Also, I've learned that email can wait. Which leads me to my next point . . .

I am starting to batch email at work. Another effective strategy. I've taken the 'shortcut' for email off of my desktop. What a simple, yet effective, move! I can no longer reflexively click once and see what scintillating piece of news my administration is sharing with me. I have come to realize how much the pseudo-immediacy of email had come to rule my life. In the words of one of my colleagues, "If you're constantly checking email and responding right away, it means that you're working according to other people's agendas instead of your own."

An excellent thought and even more reason to go on email vacations on the weekends, during off hours, and on mini-vacations when other work needs to get done.

Of course, some of you receive these posts via email. But that's cool. My advice is really special and all, but it can wait. A while.

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How to Capitalize on Your Breakthroughs: Elation, Reflection, Intention

Picture it. You've been plugging away at something for days, weeks, even months or years. Maybe it's a poem or difficult feat of strength. And, suddenly, after so many tries, it happens. You've made it. You've had a breakthrough.

My thoughts and feelings after a breakthrough:

Stage 1. Elation. Woo hoo!

Stage 2. Boy oh boy, this took a long time. I had to do a lot.

Stage 3. What should I do next?

Stages 1 to 3 take around a minute, perhaps two. Hmmmmm.

Maybe that's a bit too quick? Maybe it's time to slow things down just a bit? After all, you've just had a BREAKTHROUGH. In some way, you've become a better person. Doesn't this deserve a bit more contemplation, a bit more thought? I think so. In fact, taking some more time should help you to capitalize on your success.

Today's advice is rather simple: After a breakthrough, experience what you experience, but slower:

1. Elation: Savor the Moment!

If you're Canadian, this step might be the most difficult of the three. We're not all that big on celebrating ourselves. But, come on. You've been working your butt off. Time to give yourself a pat on the back. Maybe reward yourself. Treat yourself to a big lunch (unless you've been trying to cut down on calories). Perhaps tell someone of your accomplishment. Even the most self-absorbed of folks can briefly focus on you and say something positive.

2. Reflection

As you're congratulating yourself, take some time to reflect on all of the hard work and sacrifices that got you to where you are. It's all too easy, methinks, to forget. Ironically, the longer you've been plugging away, the harder it might be to picture your life before you started trying so hard. This act of reflection will do two things: a) It will make you realize that you are a strong person who can accomplish real change; b) It will help you plan for the next step. Yes, not too much resting on your laurels . . .

3. Intention: Plan for the Next Stage!

You've had one breakthrough, it's time to start working toward the next one. Unless you're Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Greenbridge, Essex, time to start working on your next poem. Or maybe you want to ran farther. Or maybe . . . You get the idea. Nothing like a breakthrough to get things rolling along.

Have Fun!

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What Do You REALLY Need to Do Today? Three Ways to Get on Track Now

If you're like me, you're busy. Busy busy busy. All sorts of tasks, important tasks, demand your attention. But how to pick? What's the most important thing to do? I don't know about you, but deciding what to do next can be as hard, if not harder, than actually doing something!

Here are a few tricks that should clear your head and get you going.

1. Prioritize After You Prioritize

Even after you prioritize, it can still be hard to decide what to do next. You look at the top three (or even five!) tasks on your list and it's not immediately obvious which one is most important. I suggest that you take a deep breath and really try to pick the most important task. If you can, that's great! If you can't, that's great too! All you need to do now is pick one at random. Or you could . . .

2. Do the Least Enjoyable Thing First

I say this for two reasons: 1) You'll feel better once the least enjoyable thing is done; 2) Your ability to concentrate and stay on task is, all things being equal, at a peak before you start working away. So, you have a much better shot of doing the task well, and relatively quickly, if you do it first.

3. Do Something!

If you're all atwitter and you can't focus on my first and second suggestions, just do something. It may not be the most important thing, but it's something and that's better than nothing.

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